Some people want to avoid conflict no matter what. Perhaps they do not want to upset their partner or they avoid conflict because they are fearful. Regardless of the reason, avoiding confrontations can become more problematic than dealing with issues head on. That is because when conflict is not addressed, many of a couple’s problems end up unresolved.
When issues get swept under the rug, they do not go away. This often means that unresolved conflicts will slowly build up in a relationship until they are almost impossible to resolve. That build-up can result in relationships ending suddenly, with one partner unaware that there are problems to begin with. That is because when conflict is avoided, one or both people in the relationship is not getting their needs met.
Occasionally, when a partner is not getting their needs met they may react with passive-aggressive behaviors such as:
- Refusing to Talk
- Angry Outbursts
These sorts of behaviors bring further harm to the relationship and continue to damage communication. As resentment builds and sharing feelings, goals, and needs continues to deteriorate, many couples turn to therapy.
Learning to Have Healthy Conflict with a Relationship Counsellor
It is important to remember that anger and conflict are not bad in a relationship. There are many ways to have healthy conflicts with your partner, and it is important to work through any anger issues that you have. Knowing that you can disagree, get angry, and work through these problems makes a relationship stronger.
It is possible to learn how to have solid conflict resolution skills. It takes courage and practice to address conflict if you have been avoiding it, but relationship counselling can help to alleviate any stress. If you and your partner are ready to learn to have healthy conflict in Calgary, contact me today to schedule an intake appointment.