Men seem to be naturally possessive. They want to feel as though they’re the only ones that get the privilege of your company and the only ones that are allowed to see you as an attractive, sexual, funny being. A little bit of jealousy is relatively harmless, and may be caused by:
- Feelings of inadequacy
- Lack of intimacy
- Not spending enough time together
- Being stupid, because men are stupid
- Flirty behaviors
Every individual case of jealousy is different, but if it’s small, limited to a few isolated incidents, and doesn’t cause any big arguments, it’s not too much of an issue and unlikely to affect your relationship.
But when that jealousy gets out of hand, it’s no longer cute. Far too many women stay with jealous boyfriends because they’re convinced that the jealousy is caused by love, but intense jealousy is rarely caused by love or affection. It may be caused by:
- Severe feelings of inadequacy.
- Lack of trust
- Control issues.
These are serious problems that affect your relationship, and unless you can solve these issues, the relationship needs to end. You cannot have a successful relationship with someone that is overly controlling, unable to experience confidence, or lacks trust in the relationship. You see these behaviors with men that get jealous when other guys look at you, as though that is your fault. Or men that always need to know what you’re doing, and get angry when you don’t let them know where you are. If you cannot reduce these problems, the relationship cannot be healthy. Here are some solutions you can try to solve these issues.
This is the least problematic of the three issues, but can still be a problem. If your partner feels inadequate, spend a little time feeding their ego. Try to stay away from minor criticisms, spend a lot of time with them, and make sure they see how happy you are with them. This should make the inadequacy go away, and if it doesn’t, then your boyfriend may need to get help.
- Lack of Trust
Dealing with this can be tricky. Spending time with your partner and opening up to them about everything that goes on in your life is a start. Never hide anything, no matter how small, and try to build trust by making sure they understand that you care about them and would never do anything they don’t approve of. Unfortunately, there are very few other ways to build trust, and if this doesn’t work, you may be with someone that can never be completely trusting.
- Control Issues
This is someone you break up with. Unfortunately, many men become jealous because they need to control their partner and all other men represent a threat from that control. It doesn’t matter how flattered you feel, relationships with controlling men do not work, and can become emotionally or physically violent over time.
Breaking Up is Hard to Do
Jealousy is one of those relationship factors that, if it persists, needs to cause the end of the relationship. Remember, as much as you love your partner, a relationship that has too much jealousy is one that won’t bring you happiness in the long run. Try to reduce their jealousy using the above techniques, but if they don’t work, make sure you’re strong enough and ready to end the relationship, no matter how much you may care about him.