Men, are you looking for a “magic wand,” pill, or potion that will allow you to see into the mind of a woman? Well, good luck on your quest, because unfortunately, those things don’t work. You may make very well-intentioned attempts to try to “figure out a woman.” Perhaps your idea of a “perfect woman” is depicted on television, be it a celebrity, rock star, reality show figure, or the like.
On the contrary, you know EXACTLY what you want or desire in a partner; someone who is attractive, but not too pretty that she’s going to turn heads and cause suspicion in you every time she makes eye contact with a man. You want to be respected and treated with kindness and in some cases, you may look for a mate who is “just like mom.” Or, you may want a partner who is “NOTHING like mom!”
Past hurts can shape your current relationships
If you’ve been wounded, cheated, disrespected, or abandoned in the past, rest assured, your guard is going to be up, and with good reason! If you have been hurt by a woman, learning how to love and trust again can take time. Give yourself the opportunity to heal and rebuild after a broken relationship.
You CAN be a good listener
Often, we hear the stereotypical statement alluding to the fact that women tend to be much better listeners than men. This is false! Men just listen differently than women do. While it’s true that women may be able to hear several conversations at once, addressing each one accordingly, this can also be said of men. Men and women process information differently, and sometimes men simply choose to use less words than a woman.
Not all men are created equally
How do you feel when you hear a woman declare that all men are the same? Naturally, you disagree, right? Men, as well as women, are all created very differently. We are unique. We love, hurt, laugh, dream, and most of us endeavor to push forward and be the best at who we are. This doesn’t describe all people, but it would be a very safe assumption to make that most people would rather do good than bad. So, when you get “put into a box,” you might feel disrespected, confused, dismissed, or even feel angry.
Although this article is geared toward a man, we can all benefit from practicing the Golden Rule (or ethic of reciprocity.) “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” This is a valuable first step in relationship advice for men.
- Do you want to be respected? Show respect to your partner.
- Do you want to feel valued? Value your partner.
- Do you want to be heard? Listen to your partner.
Assume nothing! As a man, being quiet may be just what you need at the end of a long day, but be prepared to listen to your partner unload as it pertains to the kids, her mother, or her bad hair day! It may take her 24 minutes to say what you could have communicated in three. Patience and understanding is the key. Pretty soon, you’ll be the one at your favorite sports bar, at the water cooler, or your kids soccer game dolling out relationship advice for men!